Unanswered Prayers

Why do I feel so lonely? 

My smile seems bright but my soul is empty..

I feel like nobody cares about me. 

I feel like people see me, but they don’t really see.. Me. 


What do I do to obtain joy? 

Do I go out drinking and spend time with boys?

Or do I go to church because ‘in His presence there is a fullness of joy.’


The thing is, I don’t feel joy and I certainly don’t feel your presence. 

It feels like everyone is getting that touch from heaven.. except me. 

Instead I bleed.. 

Instead I count to three and pray I fall asleep. 


I’m sorry. 

I’m sorry that I don’t feel joy. 

I’m sorry that I’m not your perfect daughter. 

I’m sorry that I don’t feel laughter.  

I’m sorry that there’s no happy ever after. 


Unfortunately I live in misery…

Unfortunately I’m not who you want me to be.

You keep telling me that you want me to be happy;

But if that’s true then why won’t you help me?


Why won’t you deliver me from this evil?

Why won’t you deliver me from this rival?

Why won’t you come down and save me?

Or do you just want to me to be unhappy?


Because trust me I’m trying,

But the devil is lying through his teeth and smiling,

He’s loving the hurt that I’m going through,

But it’s killing me, I promise you. 


So do what you will but I can’t suffer anymore, 

I understand that when I knock you will open the door,

But I’ve been knocking, I’ve been crying whilst deep inside I’m dying, 

It feels like you’re distant and that you don’t love me anymore. 

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