Life is a journey

Why am I still dealing with fear? After all I've been through to get me here? Knocking on people's doors once in a while.. ..to not being able to speak on the man who made my life worthwhile, I've been crippled with fear, It's like people have ears but they're not willing to hear.. ..but how do I know that when I haven't stepped out? Do you know what it takes to speak to a crowd? One to one evangelism was easier for me, It's part of my calling, part of my destiny, I'm sorry God for the lost souls I could have touched, I hope to be back in the game once I understand your love, That perfect love that casts out all fear, 1 John 4:18, trust me I'm all ears, I'll meditate, pray and do what I need to do, Because I know that it takes love to do the things which you do.

 Anxiety... Sometimes I feel like I can't breathe, It's like my heart is racing and cannot be eased... I can't breathe, No, no one is holding me down yet I can't breathe, Why's no one there to help me? Oh yes... it's because they can't see, They cannot see what's making me unable to breathe, They cannot see that I am lacking peace, Deep breaths.. in and out.. Why can't I breathe? Can you let me out? Out of this place that's confiding me in... …oh it's my own space, how can it be troubling? I mean.. there's people around that I don't want to see, People around that I think are judging me, But why do I care when they cannot see me...? They cannot see me for who God has called me to be. Why do I care what they think of me? When the Lord has made me who I am, I am complete, I am his daughter, the daughter of the King, The daughter of a King who cares for me, "I am that I am" says, the Lord, I am his daughter therefore I am bold.

It's only by your grace, That I'm still here, that I wait, Waiting for the sun to shine on a cloudy day, From depression to joy, your word will not return to me void, I love you even when you don't bring me joy, I get annoyed and irritated but you're still on my mind, I always wonder if something is wrong when you've gone quiet, But I've been told that that means you're about to do something, maybe a crazy something, Maybe those dreams and visions will come to pass, Maybe I'll attend my second dance class, Maybe I'll have a relationship that will last, And maybe I will not have to prove my worth, Because you know me and your word does not return to me void, Even if I feel empty right now I know you don't mess with my joy, Because you want what's best for me, you want my joy, You don't want me to feel saddened about this boy, I know you love me I know you care, But sometimes I feel like that love isn't there, I don't feel it, I don

Fear. It's something most of us deal with. But why do we fear when God is for us? If God is for us who can be against us? For we do not have a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind, But have you let God inside? Have you let the Lord God Almighty shine his light? Have you read the word or have neglected it for some time? For our faith is wavering, we have lost sight, Put on your armour of God and the shield of faith, Because it's God that will save us, he always paves the way,  He always makes a way, where there is no way, So trust in the Lord God Almighty, He will never leave nor forsake you, He doesn't want you to be stressed or worried, He simply wants to free you, He wants to free you from the wild thoughts that enter your mind, The spirit of fear that is dwelling inside, Because we have no fear with the power of Christ, That expels all darkness and gives us life, A life free from sin and a life free from darkness, A life within him and complete aw

I knew when you responded without seeing your name appear on my phone, I had a gut feeling it was you and would go and see what you said, I knew when you'd seen my message, I'd wake up just before you've sent a text, And I wondered if I was going crazy or if these were signs, Signs that we were destined to be in each others lives, Signs that you were the one I'd marry, that I'd be your wife, Signs that you were going to be the father of my kids, that we'd create life, But the truth is I'm not sure, God said you were but not how long for, Maybe you were meant to be, but not for too long, Or maybe I was overthinking it all along, Or maybe you were and it was meant to last a lifetime, But instead of fighting the battle the devil won and we lost the fight, We lost each other, you were no longer in my life, We went our separate ways and you were doing just fine, I thought I could block you out but I had thought wrong, Because every time I'

I thought I was healed but I wasn't fully, Because spiritually I was okay but I wasn't mentally and physically, I was comforted whenever I'd cry alone, It's like one moment I'm crying for help and the next I know I'm not on my own, Like if I died today I'd be happy because I'd be in a safer place, But I've started this marathon I need to complete this race, I was hurt but I was okay, God helped me, he eased the pain, He was always there to save the day, Whenever I felt like I wanted to give up and throw everything away, I would pray to God and ask for happiness, And within a moment I'd feel comforted, I'd feel his warmth, I'd feel his presence, Whilst I was in the storm, I wasn't stressing, He helped me be still when I was panicking, He helped me feel peace when my heart was hurting, Although I struggled to leave my bed I was okay, Although I couldn't eat I was okay, Although I cried every time I got home I w